who knows what Love is? 10/02/19

this blog post is inspired by the song by Strawberry Switchblade…

I tend to fall in love with minor things. The rhythm of a song, the smell of certain flora, the smile or laugh of a stranger. It makes me happy to appreciate the details in life, and I hold them dear to my heart because I think each day is a gift and one should find something to be grateful in the trans course of their 24 hour period.

Each memory I make, especially those that bring me to smile, I keep them close to my heart and before I rest my head on my pillow I think of them again. Perhaps due to my empathetic nature, it is very easy for my emotions to be jostled by simple things. Perhaps due to me having nothing for the majority of my life I find value in things one wouldn’t glance over twice.

My life is not average, I am not average. I am not a pro domme, but have the ability to be. I choose to be who I am, and choose to be with certain people….

The people I keep in my life, it is because I love them or care for them deeply. There are very few people I stay in touch with. I want to know that they are happy, and if they are not, I want them to share their emotions with me.

My heart is a big house. But lately I feel it has been your halfway house.

You live here, with support and comfort. But I know your intentions are to leave once you are at your best.

Don’t forget where you came from, don’t forget where you were before and who you were before, and where you were while you worked to become the best person you could be.

Everything that comes around goes around, and maybe one day you will remember the support you had, and that this heart was a home for you and that is no longer yours.

angloamerican men are (tw:raceplay)

  • dumb
  • annoying
  • pussies
  • boring

and meant to be my bitches. You are crazy to even *think* that I would ever love you. I’m with you to see you and make you cry. I fuck up your mind thinking I care and love you, but its all part of my plan.

What is my plan, you ask?

Well, my dear slave, its simply act in a way that makes you believe that you have me, that I am yours, that what we have is unique, to make you feel as IF you were a hot shot. I bet it stokes your bitch ego to think that a hot Latina wants you, and that actually enjoys hanging out with you.

You will mistakingly think I’m content, and you stop trying – because there will come a point where your ego becomes so big, you mistakingly think I am happy and that were happy, and that everything is good, that you are THE man. And you are too stupid and small minded that you won’t realize I’m already looking for fit, smart, upcoming guys my age, or at least 10 years younger than you, to fuck and suck.

I want to see my bitch boyfriend watch me get fucked by a real man. I want my slave to cry while bound, gagged and helpless, watching his “trophy” get pleased immenseley in a way that he knows he never could.

Ideally, my lover will be another latino. And you will see why we are superior. I will make you suck his cock after it was in my tight, young pussy. I will see in your eyes how much you love me, and I will laugh, and he will laugh while throat fucking you.

Why would I love a colonizer, a capitalist, a beneficiary of white privilege? You submit because its the only way you can make it up to me, because you know if you weren’t white you’d be fucking nothing.

Be fucking grateful I grace you with my godliness, bitch.

Now lick my superior brown foot, and stay chaste for me forever.

We don’t need more parasites like you walking around.

Cry for me. Beg for my forgiveness.

06/27/2019

I’ve becoming increasingly independent that it is now out of my comfort and is overwhelming me,.

Being independent and self-reliant was something I always boasted and was proud of, but now I don’t want it. I would like to know what it feels like to not worry about controlling every aspect of my life, to let go, to be free.

I do not recall the last time I didn’t worry, perhaps prior to my stepdad moving in with my mom when I was 7. Thankfully, he never sexually abused me but he did hit me and strike me relentlessly with the belt. I think at 10 I started inflicting pain onto myself and by 12 I started drawing blood.

My mom didn’t understand and I didn’t understand either why I would hurt myself, at times I think it was to prepare myself for future hits or also could have been me seeking some of the attention that I stopped receiving long ago. One memory that particularly stands out to me is one from when I was 10 years old and got a lead part in my 5th grade musical. I practiced every day ; I sang in the shower, practiced speech, etc., hoping to get the lead which I did and the day of the play comes and my mom comes late to my part and didn’t bring a camera.

Achievements of mine as I have aged have pretty much gone unrecognized and its frustrating. For some reason, I have come this far despite no help nor mentorship only to want to quit going on.

As a submissive, I seek the approval and long to please my Dominant, to the best of my abilities. I will try before I say no. As a submissive I am not shy, I am still confident; I choose to give up power and my pride for a moment of bliss hopefully achieved with pain.

I know nothing in life is worth having if it is easy, but I am a realist and I know those who acquire generational wealth have had it easy in the socio-economic aspect.

As a Domme, I want to inflict pain onto others, especially the rich white elite who’s Fortune 500 company only fosters disparity in our nations and abroad. I know I am Supreme. I know I am more strong and resilient than most of these men, who are nothing and of no value without their money. They are just slaves. Pitiful slaves who know they need to serve, because deep down they know that they are terrible human beings. I will make you fall in love with me, with the goal to break your heart and take all your money. Take every last cent as reparations for the unnecessary suffering I’ve endured caused by centuries of withheld social constructs made by your race.

can I just wake up to $xx,xxx dollars and relax , I deserve it and I’m invoking it.

good night.

squirty sissy

again same disclosure on my initial post…

I wish I had the energy to post this sooner, as I have been wanting to divulge every detail about June 1st – 3rd. That weekend was the most memorable, fun, and eclectic experience I’ve had to date; I loved every moment of it and it would be a complete shame if I didn’t share.

Hope to make many of you sissies’ clitty twitch :*

A little background story… I had my first submissive when I was 22. A successful attractive man, a freak, a nasty ho. A man who as a sissy gave no fucks, energetic – there was never a dull moment with him. Lets call him Christina.

For x reason, we went on a hiatus and just stopped talking. Which was for the best, because I was going through a personal difficulty. After perhaps 9 months of not talking, he sends me an email signed with his real name, subject : “Has mistress been served better?”.

I was annoyed, but really wanted to see him again. Christina exudes sissy/submissive energy and I love that. I replied, asked him why he was contacting me again when we left in non speaking terms, to which he replied, “I came back withclitty hanging between my legs, begging mistress for another chance”. Super hot, definitely fed my ego and it would be a lie if I said that was not one of the factors that made me decide to see him again.

What could be hotter than power exchanging with a man who’s twice your age who works your dream job, spends money on you without flinching, and is physically attractive? Even though Christina can be sassy and bratty, I have a soft spot for her being the first bitch that degrades itself for me. I remember picking her outfit our first time together…

Okay I digress.


We met up at the parking lot of a local sex shop. I told him that he better pick the most stripper slutty attire to wear underneath a casual outfit, as of course, the point is for him to remind him who he really is underneath his professional clothes. A white whore. I chose a cute outfit for myself, nothing too special but I know I look good in all my outfits. I arrived to the lot, the axles of my car are fucked so I was readjusting my parking and that when I see Christina come in with it’s Mercedes-Benz. I finish park my car, again, and just sit in my car thinking, “Damn, I’m really going to hang out with this bitch again. Let’s see how this goes”. Christina peers into my car and waves at me and I smile back. As I get out of my car to get into his I notice its all busted. The right side mirror, cracked with glass missing. The gas panel, fucked too. Whatever, so I get into his car and this man cannot stop grinning at me, and I knew it was because I looked fucking HOT. Even hotter than when he saw me last. What a lucky sissy, what a privilege to be my first white slutty sissy ass – to serve me, entertain me, and to be in my presence. Maybe I was far too lenient, perhaps I should not have given that chance again but my little sissy really proved how sorry she was for displeasing me.

But first, we had to break Christina out of her shell. Wasn’t difficult for one to notice she was nervous. So I put my hand on her thigh and tell her its okay, that I understand she’s nervous and to talk it out. Apparently, my sissy slave hasn’t played since she last saw me and could no longer keep its submissive cravings bottled up.

Image result for sissification

*more to come 😉 keep in mind this was 2 nights and 3 mornings.*