Category: Uncategorized

This ode is to the idea of you, for that is whom I am truly pining for.

Writing in my journal does not suppress the intense emotions and dreams thinking of you brings me.

I juggle between worlds, attempting to find the right words or expressions to describe each emotion that my Heart births for you. For you I created a philosophy;

abstruse, ageless and ancestral definitions of passion and love.

I have gathered for you the most beautiful and desirable of my dreams that I have sowed and reaped by the Spring of my life, tender products of my sweat and blood.

What have you done to deserve this devotion, to deserve My most sincere confessions.

Are you my Achilles heel?

We are opposites, You and I.

You are left, I am right

You,

A logical man, determined to make illogical

I am your Life.

The fire of your loins.

Your sin, your soul.

I want to dance,

I want my dress to cling to my body,

I want you to watch.

I want you to love and adore me,

desire me,

sing and read to me,

until I fall asleep.

I have a jewelry box,

full of beating hearts

yours is not in it.

Me hiciste llorar,

y mi hiciste recordar

que no soy suficiente.

I want to dance with others,

and smile and laugh

playfully

innocently

make you desire me

No volvere amar asi

y espero

que valores

y guardes

este grande amor

que sostuve por ti

Te amo

sin cesar

sin questionar

los miles de crimenes

que has hecho

contra mi

y a mi corazon

cuerpo

y alma

me tienes trastornada

lastimada

desesperada

por ti

que veneno me diste

por que la inocencia que tengo se va desvaneciendo

si quieres que sea mala

sere tu diabla

dame tu mano

y baila conmigo

este bals

de mentiras y pasión.

Not sure how I was popular on my old blog, but I feel it was because I continuously talked into the void

I bull shit too much through life, but I digress.

I’ve been thinking a lot about of one my exes, Julian, who literally begged me to not break up and who consistently tried to win me back. He was not a perfect boyfriend, he was lazy and had little aspirations but he had an innocent heart.

He hurt me a few times, with stupid shit and I stayed because he would give an effort in trying.

He was fun in the beginning but he did a lot of head-ass things, to the point he became unattractive to me. Which was crazy, because a lot of young and older women (lol) found him attractive and would try to flirt with him in front of me. But I knew I had him so wrapped on my finger i didn’t care. I wanted to end it because I could no longer stand to feel his lips pressed against mine.

After we broke up for good, he came to my house the next day. I told him to leave and he said no, unless I agreed to get back together. He thought it was just a tantrum I was throwing, but truly I had met someone else I wanted to try with. I was very mean to Julian, humiliating him and destroying any arguments he had as to why we belonged together. He looked on the brink of tears as he pleaded me to take him back.

“How are you going to ask for me back when you have nothing to offer? How can you say you want to win me over yet come to my house empty handed?”

And this boi heard this and left. I gave a sigh of relief but the show started again when he came back 20 minutes later with a bouquet of sunflowers to offer me.

I just threw them at him.

And I told him that it was done and that he could not offer me what I wanted. Which was true, I begged HIM to go back to school continuously while together and he never listened. So why should I listen to him.

We last spoke in February, probably before Valentine’s Day. I thought Maybe he wanted to be friends, which was false. So I gave himhis last blessing and haven’t heard from him since

I deserve to feel what he felt. I accept my pain

White men think that buying at Whole Foods and Sprouts, using reusable stainless steel straws and hiking gonna save the damn earth…

no bitch

use your fucking money to assist others

I used to think white men who cared about the environment must care as well for the indigenous people residing in the most vulnerable places with the nicest ecosystems

but truly white men only care about wildlife and fuckall for the human race

what has changed? absolutely fucking nothing

you colonize, rape, take and take and take throughout the centuries

when will you reach your fill?

when will you be satisfied?

all white men do is take and take until nothing is left.

you care about the environment for your own selfish gain… for the chance to vacation there.

my family’s land is not your vacation center, you brought drugs and firearms into my land,

took my woman, traffic my people, exploit people’s vulnerabilities for your own capitalistic gain

white latinos also benefit from the system

and just so everyone knows; I will defend the most helpless and vulnerable to death. and perhaps myself I do not identify as black, but my grandfather was AfroCubano and his family were once slaves on plantations so I understand that black people throughout history and in most parts of the globe have suffered @ the hands of white men!!!!!!!!

if you reading this, donate to George Floyd funeral, or to a non profit that assists immigrant children.

send me a pic of your donation and we will talk.

If you were me, and I were you;

I would be constantly woo-ing you, making You smile and blush.

I want to be brush you use at night before bed, the sandals you put on in the morning. I want to be the first thing your perfect feet step on.

You would be my muse. I would do anything for you. I would do anything to keep you happy. Even if that meant letting you go

I know you don’t love me the same way I love you.

I would put my world at your feet.

You truly are the devil