kick back your feet, recline.
your hands are behind your head. you look up at the ceiling.
big deep breathe. exhale
who are you sighing for?
for yourself, because youre tired of it all
for someone who tugs on your heart
its those lonely nights that don’t make it all worth it
but at the same time that loneliness justifies it all
funny how moments like these are luxurious
they make you feel like maybe,
it has all been for nothing
how lucky you are,
to have no one immediately depend on you,
to have a sacred space for yourself
what defines you?
looking at the numbers, you’re satisfied.
waking up, make your bed.
watch the news.
grab the car keys,
you’re out the door.
you’re in the office again.
it gnaws at you,
so you’re out again.
a walk, a bike ride. anything to escape the feeling of being
a million and one thoughts run through your head,
sometimes none at all.
you glance at the arbitrary numbers on your phone,
you go to bed.
hit your head on the pillow,
its those lonely nights that make it all worth it,
solitude that justifies it all
years and years of the same routine
you can never have it all.