Being in love is a state of submission in itself. Loving someone who doesn’t reciprocate is draining and painful, yet we can’t help our emotions.

I want out.

I don’t enjoy how I feel. My judgment becomes clouded, and I repress my intuition. My mind says I’m stupid for falling for you.

I can’t help but think of the worst, and it seems you enjoy seeing me get on my knees and revere you.

Maybe you think confidently every day that I believe all of the lies, but the truth is I simply play along.

I hate the fact that I’m monogamous emotionally and sexually, that even entertaining the thought of fucking someone else is hard to do. For a fleeting moment it’s there, and then I realize my own truth, and then it’s gone.

I will continue loving you, because I know that I can’t help myself.

I will continue to blindingly love you, because I know that in this life everything you do comes back to you.

One thought on “01/06/2020

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